Thursday, September 17, 2015
In which I venture out of my comfort zone.
Earlier this week, I went to a knitting group for the first time.
I had been thinking lately about how lovely it would be if my town had a yarn shop. I mean, the online knitting community (blogs, Ravelry, podcasts, etc.) is amazing and I'm really thankful for it. But I'm rarely around other knitters in real life. A couple of times a year, maybe, at craft fairs or fiber festivals. So I've always been a solitary knitter, and I'd been okay with that. I'm a homebody, anyway, and I'm content curled up in a chair, watching a favorite movie or show and knitting away.
But suddenly I just really wanted to be around other knitters. I remembered that someone (the lady who I got my spinning wheel from, actually) had told me about a group of knitters that meet once a week. So that's how I found myself driving to Starbucks one evening and knitting with three other knitters for a couple of hours. Everyone was kind and it was really nice, and I'll be going back.
If you had told me a month ago that I'd be going to a place I've never been before* and hanging out with people I'd never met, I would have laughed. That's so unlike me. Basically, I'm a hobbit...adventures make me nervous. I'm an introvert who likes my comfort zone, thank you very much. I like my routine and knowing what to expect. I know I've mentioned it before, but social things are hard for me. I'm awkward and unsure and a little too worried about how other people perceive me. I usually rely on others to start conversations because unless I know someone well, it's hard for me to do that.
I'm not sure how writing about a knitting group morphed into a discussion of my social awkwardness, but there it is. :) I guess these things have been on my mind lately. You know those people who seem to be naturally confident? Not an arrogant, bold confidence, but a quiet, genuine one. People who just seem really comfortable being themselves, wearing what they want to wear, and doing what they enjoy doing. It's like it never crosses their mind to fret over how others see them. I'm jealous of those people and inspired by them. As someone who has always struggled with insecurities, I dream of being like that someday.
I don't know where I'm going with all of this, and honestly it's probably a bit more personal than I'd intended. I know that going to knitting group probably seems like a tiny thing in the grand scheme of things. But I did something that I was afraid of doing and hopefully that's a step (however small) in the right direction.
*Yes, this was my first time going to Starbucks. I don't drink coffee, so it's not exactly the sort of place I'd find myself drawn to. The hot chocolate was good but not any better than what I make at home, I think. I love the smell of coffee, though, so the whole place does smell amazing.